26 November 2011 @ 08:59 pm
As a little girl, more than anything in the entire world, I wanted to be Sailor Moon. She was my idol, the person I tried my hardest to be like. I would cry at night, a lot of it induced by the panic attacks I had as little girl and still have to today, because I knew I would never grow up to be as beautiful or as kind or as wonderful. I would never live forever. I would never save the world. I would never have a love like hers.

I wanted to be Sailor Moon more than anything, and I would pray to God that if he could grant me this one wish that I would save the world over and over again. I knew it would never come true, but it didn't stop me from wishing every single night as a child. I would look to the stars, and wish. I would wish before I fell asleep. Sailor Moon became more than a television show, it became who I needed to be.

It may sound silly for a grown woman to admit this, but I still want to be Sailor Moon. I still want to be strong, and beautiful, and selfless. And every day I try and strive to be just that. I've been working hard to be Sailor Moon since I was a little girl, and even though I've never had the chance to become a super hero, never saved the world, and I may never live forever, I feel like trying to be her made me a better person.

There are a million things that have made me who I am today, but Sailor Moon is one of those things, and I will never forget it.
Current Mood: grateful
I had the worst nightmare last night. It was just... insane, and it was frighteningly similar to other dreams I've had.

My mother was getting married, and I was planning the wedding. Everything was going perfectly. The wedding was going to take place at my old high school because of how large it was, and I was picking up the bride and groom (and another person who is escaping my memory). I cried as we were heading to the school, and I was blamed for trying to steal spotlight from my mother, and for not being happy for her; I tried to explain, rather desperately, that I was just happy that I got to be so involved.

We arrive at the school, and there are people here and there. A few I recognize, and a few I don't. Everyone was dressed beautifully, and the decorations were stunning. Without any warning, people started panicking and piling out of the school. There were screams, and blood. A firetruck arrives, the emergency lights are what I remember the most vividly, and the firemen enter the school.

I head in after, determined to find out what was going on. I encounter the chief, a medium built black man, and demand to know. He ignores. I'm furious, so I follow after him. It's then a strange man, hobbling, and reaching his arms out enters the hallway we're in. The chief looks at him, and then me, and says,"There isn't going to be a wedding."

It's then I realize that more than half the guests are dead, and people are still screaming and bleeding and panicking. The chief leaves the hallway through a side door, and the strange, hobbling man turns towards me. I have no idea what took me so long to realize that this man, all bloodied and torn, wasn't alive. I race from the school, having to go a long, and roundabout way to find the exit due to the amassing dead. There isn't time to kill them because I have to get back to my mother.

I make it out there, and her fiance is dead. She's crying. Everyone is crying. I'm flooded with guilt because this was my fault; I was supposed to pick them up sooner for the wedding, but I think I got sidetracked. If they had gotten here sooner, they might have had a chance to be married before this mess happened.

More happened, but I can't remember the rest. Only bits and pieces. I just know it was absolutely horrible, and even after I got up I couldn't shake the guilt and terror from me. The dream made sense, and didn't run off on some odd tangent like most of my nightmares do, and I just... I'm still reeling.
Current Mood: groggy
18 June 2010 @ 04:36 pm
My puppy is limping, and I'm worried.  She isn't whimpering or anything, but it's still the fact that she won't walk on one of her front legs.  My dad says give it a day or two, and if she still is, we'll take her in to the vet, but I don't wanna wait.

My poor baby better be all right.

In other news, I'm seriously considering buying a movie theatre.  I've been talking about it with a couple of people, family and friends, and we've been waxing ideas, such as how to make it popular, themes, food, etc, etc.  It'll cost quite a bit of money, but...  it would be totally worth it after awhile.

BUT I NEED YOUR HELP, FLIST.  You all like movies, right?  And you all like movie theatres, right?  I kind of want to know your thoughts on themed rooms (eg: super mario kind of room, or black and white horror movie style, stuff like that), and food!  I don't know about anyone else, but I've always hated the same old same old movie theatre food.  I was thinking carnival type food, but there's so many different types that can be made...
Current Music: 2ne1 - FIRE (English)
Current Mood: contemplative